Psalm 13

How long, O Lord? Will you forget me for ever?
How long will you hide your face from me?
How long must I bear pain in my soul,
and have sorrow in my heart all day long?
How long shall my enemy be exalted over me?

Consider and answer me, O Lord my God!
Give light to my eyes, or I will sleep the sleep of death,
and my enemy will say, ‘I have prevailed’;
my foes will rejoice because I am shaken.

But I trusted in your steadfast love;
my heart shall rejoice in your salvation.
I will sing to the Lord,
because he has dealt bountifully with me.

I am inclined to sorrow, melancholy, a kind of chronic depression.

In a roundabout way this is related - not exactly caused - to not achieving my mother's expectations (and for many years my own expectations) and the tension between these old expectations and my own still emerging sense-of-self.

I am shaken. I am uneasy. I am, in real ways, diseased.

Despite pain, sorrow, and failure, God has dealt bountifully with me. I am blessed by opportunity, creativity, and a wide array of meaningful relationships. My eyes see the light of God and it brightens my sometimes troubled journey.

I rejoice. I sing. I give thanks.

Psalm 13